Get my act together
I've been brought up with the idea that problems which can be solved with money are not really problems after all. Which is why finding a flat in London is to me much easier than finding one here in Switzerland. Coming from a broken family gave me the chance to be who I am today. Problems had to be faced, and though I was an unhappy child I reveled in the luck of having a funded overseas education, a luxury that not many children can afford to have. And because parents have moved on to have their own life, I never had to worry about obligations to 'pay back' what was invested in me.
So it is time to get my act together. After all, I am still very lucky to have come this far. Money matters always hurt, but then money can be used to solve problems. And this time it is no exception. I need to tell myself to be thankful that I have an income at the very least. And that I have this opportunity that money cannot buy. It is time for me to stop thinking about that very daunting five-figure sum, but to think about how I could go about finding that balance between affording what I want and to pay off this immense debt that was not of my doing.
Emotions take time to cool, and cool off they will but I hope not with too much of a loss of respect. In the end, we are all very different people and we cannot expect others to live up to our own expectations especially of ourselves. What I could achieve someone else may not be able to. Like Zheyi said, "Life is beautiful because we fuck up!"
